Amy Law

I once borrowed mum’s shoes… the problem was she’s a size 4 and I’m a 5 ½… oh the traps of vanity! By the end of the afternoon, my feet were so sore I didn’t think I could take another step, let alone last the night in those shoes. So, in my desperate bid to relieve my distressed feet, I tried on and bought a pair of similar looking shoes in size 5 as they did not come in 5 ½ (*meh* it’s only ½ a size small after all wasn’t it?).

In the desperate state of my feet, it seemed the size 5 was a huge relief and refreshingly comfortable. A few days later when I wore my new pair of shoes again I was astonished to find that they had shrunk!

The truth of the matter is that they had not shrunk. It was just that when my feet had recovered and were not in the dire condition of that fateful day (when vanity got the better of me *oh shame*), my feet were in a better shape to properly feel/discover the shoes… and all was revealed! T’was a tad small and in actual fact not at all as comfortable as I had first imagined them to be.

Aahhh… so many parallels I can draw from this. Perhaps it can be likened to relationships (though it really could relate to any desperate situation causing clouded decisions) … could it be that when we are hurting and in a state of desperation, we may have tendencies to make decisions riddled with fraught?

…only to, one day, wake up to the imposing reality… the truth of the matter.

I’M BACK!

Woah! It’s been soooo long since I last posted. So much has happened… I’ll guess I’ll just have to pick up from here  =)

The other night we were celebrating a friend’s bday. T’was meant to be a surprise party involving family & friends… but the people who fell under the ‘friends’ category were all 2.5 hours late with the bday boy (in their defense, it wasn’t their fault).

Anyhow, I found myself surrounded by the bday boy’s family… which was fine by me coz the crowd included an extremely adorable 9 month old bub. For 2.5 hours, I watched as the bub’s doting grandparents played with him, cuddled and kissed him, fussed over him, clearly very proud of him and saying over and over again how he is THE cutest baby on earth! (a comment which I politely smiled at… hey, he IS adorable!… but no one will ever win over my heart like my little niece & nephews… competition is simply non-existent!), helping him take very shaky, aided steps yet seeing the potential of a champion rugby player in him.  (their behaviour, might I say, is exactly like that of my parents with my niece and nephews =) )

Such expressions of love, joy, tenderness… such hope and belief in the little one… such pleasure in receiving a response from him. As I watched this beautiful exchange, I begin to ponder… I wonder if that’s what God is like with us.

I’ve learned to hold everything loosely because it hurts when God pries my fingers from it   ~ Corrie Ten Boom ~ 

A transaction happened tonight between my Maker and I 

“Take me and break me, mould me and make me” was my prayer tonight… to live a life called surrender…  

I think He just might take me up on that.. and when He does, I hope I will remember this prayer and the fervency with which I prayed it… and I pray that He will grant me the grace to go through with what He needs to do in me. For I want to pass through the fire, refined like precious stones, not burnt up like hay or straw. 

Struggled I did… wrestled as He brought to surface items, attitudes, people, motivations, assumed rights, desires, etc. that I hold close to my heart one at a time – “are you  willing to surrender these?” I sensed Him nudge gently but firmly. Not a painless process, yet liberating as, down on my knees snot-faced talking to God and singing “lead me to the cross”, I began to lay certain things down at the altar.  

He’s certainly not done with me yet! But nothing would be worse than missing out on the purpose of my life because I couldn’t, or should I say, wouldn’t, let go of a bowl of soup – to miss out on the destiny God authored. 

See, God doesn’t want nor need the things we hold (He can take it at will if He wanted to) but He wants it because they are the key to our heart and what He wants is the key to our heart – He wants my heart. The God of the universe, the Creator of all life, King above all kings, Ruler of heaven and earth, wants my heart??? Who can fathom this   

I only have one heart – one heart to give fully, one heart to love one person the MOST. I want that one person to be God. I only have one life – I want to live the life authored by my loving Creator, Who penned down every moment of it from start to finish before I was conceived in the natural, when I existed in His thought – carved out the path that I would walk, the course that I would run. And to hear Him say “well done, my good and faithful servant”, I will stay… for He has set eternity in my heart… and yours. 

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also ~ Matthew 6:19, 21

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Burn!                 

Tonight, I out ate Joram Bartholomew Lemuel Suede. I bet ya he’s feeling real bad going down against a girl, and especially after all the taunts he dished out from the outset of our little bet (eh hem. I mean… competition).  

In his own words, “Burn!”     J 

One small step (well, mouthful) for Amy, one giant leap for little people kind! J   Isn’t it funny the extent we will go just to WIN? I’m not feeling so great right now… I normally have two slices. Tonight, I had four! I think I ate the same portion of the metre long pizza as Christopher! And what’s made it worse is that I’ve had to drink gallons of water to quench the thirst the flavoursome pizzas stimulated! It’s also funny how we are able to stretch beyond what we think our limits are when we are motivated.

The Greatest Love Story Ever   

What I’m saying is that whilst these asian dramas and the likes of Noting Hill, Serendipity, Pride & Prejudice etc… make for good entertainment (some may beg to differ) realise that we are actually IN the greatest love storey ever! The real stuff! One day girls, perhaps God might send us a knight in shining armour to sweep us off our feet (figuratively speaking of course)… and for the blokes, perhaps He might provide for you your Eve – but know that nothing, absolutely nothing can compare with, nor take the place of Christ’s love.

Testing 1, 2, test, test…… and ……….. we’re on!! Wow! My very own blog! J How exciting! 

… oops.. I mean, Dear Blog, ….. heheh J 

Now,   I feel that I must warn you… I don’t have much of a flare in writing as some possess… in fact I can become quite incoherent at times… so please bear with me. This isn’t much of a FIRST blog entry, but I’ve given up the ideal of a “Perfect” blog entry and thought I’d just go for it! and get rid of the “Not Found” comment on this page! (& to put a smile of Mei’s face J) 

I do have two entries in the pot to be served soon… very soon… so watch this space!!

signing off ~  ayms J